“I just saw an old picture of him and his ex and now it’s all I can think about”
Typical. Bloody typical. Why is it that when we find something wonderful, that niggling voice in our minds leads us down a dark path of finding something that we can’t forget. If you’re thinking you don’t do that, you’re kidding yourself.
I suppose it’s a good thing that we want to know anything and everything about our significant others, but it goes without saying, that there are some things that are better left unsaid. Especially the past, after all, it’s the past, so it’s never good to dig it back up.
Despite this though, we’re all still guilty of doing it. We go for a mid week cocktail with the girls, whip out our FBI badges, and find out every last bit of information. Digging through all the holiday snaps, family photos, and eventually coming across the nitty gritty stuff we’re really interested in…the ex.
Why do all us girls feel the need to open up the ex files, finding out every last detail. We want to know when they got together, why it ended. I’m sure I speak for most of the female population, when I say we rarely find out anything that springs up any warning signs, and of course we most of the time we always know this is the case. But I mean, does that stop us from thinking the worst about the previous relationship? Absolutely not.
And once we’ve found one girlfriend, well then we’ve open a whole can of worms. We spend the entire night mulling over all these other girls, complaining they’re prettier, they’re skinner, blah blah blah. Then suddenly you start comparing your current relationship to those in the past. What did I tell you, the past is in the past for a reason. It’s is okay to let it bother us, to an extent though, as long as it doesn’t lead us to do something stupid. Like bring it up and potentially ruin everything.
I know so many girls that are obsessed with the ex and unfortunately it all comes down to self esteem. In an ideal world, you’d get into this wonderful new relationship and not have and desire what so ever to get the FBI passes out. Comparing every little thing to the girl in the past. When in reality, why should we care. Much like the past being in the past, an ex is an ex for a reason. You’re with your new partner, for the simple reason that you both chose each other. If he was even the slightest bit hung up over his ex, the chances are he wouldn’t be with you. Surely it’s a confidence boost being ‘the chosen one’? After all, they’ve picked you over the ex you’re spending endless time worrying over.
Take it from someone that knows and leave the past in the past. It’s not worth ruining something good over something so petty. The one and only time I give to all permission to go wild, is when the partner has lied about a previous relationship, or just gives you a straight up reason to lose it.